So many divisive topics - & I have an opinion about each of these.
Our brains are designed to categorize. It is part of how we assimilate information. But at what point does the categorization become judgment?
I like to understand my opinions & why I have them before I go spouting them off in front of others. It sucks when someone questions you on an opinion & your mind is filled with chirping crickets. Embarrassing, really.
Ultimately, I wonder what business is it of anyone's what I choose to do with my life, as long as I'm not hurting anyone else.
Sometimes? Believing in a principle is hard.
For example, I am technically pro-choice, only because I don't believe the government should regulate morality. I believe that morality is beyond the scope (and comprehension) of the government. In my mental imaginings, government would exist as a basic framework so we're not running about all rambunctious and amok.
However, actual abortion? Makes me a little ill. I am anti-abortion.
Really, I'm pro-responsibility. If you don't want to get pregnant? Either protect yourself or don't have sex. If the protection fails? That's the risk you took. Now, suck it up & accept the consequences.
I also understand there are many circumstances that turn this into a shades of gray issue. Rape, incest, certain death of mother or fetus, etc., make the choice far more complicated. I have had friends who have had abortions because they weren't "ready" for children. I disagree with their choices, but those choices were not mine to make.
When it was my turn? I wasn't "ready" either. Not even close. I made my choice. People disagreed with my choice. But it was not their choice to make.
When I got pregnant? It was because I was irresponsible. He was not planned. Nor his father "parent" material. When I got pregnant? I took responsibility for the consequences of my actions. Because the choices I made to get there? Were mine.
Also? I work. Because I have to.
But if it wasn't necessary? I don't know that I would be a SAHM. There are a lot of other factors that influence that decision besides monetary necessity. Am I a bad mother because I work? No. Would I be a better mother if I stayed at home? In some ways, I think yes, & in others, no. Much would depend on the circumstances.
Do I judge other women who work because they work? No. Do I judge SAH mom's because they stay at home? No. If that's what is best for their family, what business is it of mine?
Do I have opinions about choices people make? Yes. Do I think some people continually make stupid choices? Yes. Will I offer my opinion? Yes. Am I sometimes snarky about what people choose to do? Yes. Do I still sometimes judge despite my best efforts not to? Yes.
I do not claim to be perfect. I do not claim to have all the answers. But I also know that no one else has them all, either. My life is my journey. No one else's. I have my own lessons to learn. If you have a different opinion about a choice I've made? Congratulations. Feel free to politely explain your point of view. You might give me some new perspective that I can use to update my own viewpoint.
If you want to tell me what an idiot I am because of my choice? If you want to sanctimoniously condescend to me because you know the choice I clearly should have made? Be prepared to either be ignored, made fun of, or given suggestions as to where you can shove this "knowledge."
Besides, I have found that the people who are most sanctimonious and condescending? More often than not have no idea what they're talking about.
